Oh Christmas Tree

So we didn't get a real tree this year. We invested in an artificial one - you know the one that is overly advertised to look the most realistic with just the perfect amount of needles and lights? It is the first year I have had one in 10 years. This is because my husband (whom I love for this) who has always been so adamant about our getting a real tree. I thought it was cute and always went along with it thinking it didn't make that big of a difference outside of the fun family outing. Yes, I knew would miss that - going to the same place each year, picking one out but didn't think anything else would be missed. Until now.

 

Oh sure to bring up the fact that there would be no mess and no going out in the cold and making sure it is secured on the SUV or having to feel bad for having killed it or taking it to the street when the new year comes I thought it was a great idea. Actually we all agreed it was easier to just get one we could put out each year at our convenience and not fiddle with lights and all that other stuff I mentioned. So we did it. However when we got it all decorated and up it didn't have any charm or character. No smell. No life. We love it and appreciate it, but it is just not the same.

 

It then occurred to me that this is odd in that I had real trees growing up as a kid and even later in life. I have even experienced going into the woods and cutting a tree down. So what is different inside of me now? It is different to me now because I have a relationship with Christ where in times past I hadn't. God's word written in the Bible is true that we are born again and made new. I have no doubt about this and will testify to it. But back to the tree...

I thought about what I missed with a real tree and pondered a moment or two. I began to feel a warmth and love come over me knowing how God has created so many things for us to enjoy. Thinking about the evergreen Christmas trees, I then thought about all the kinds of trees that grow around us - even the evergreens have so many variations. I moved on to the birds, the animals, the fruit, the vegetables. So much variety.

 

Also while thinking about this I thought how different we are as people, our characters, our charm, and our life. Not so much our smells, though - funny however. But thinking like this I know even more that God loves us and he formed each one of us with His own hands and heart. Every single person is so special. He admires us just as we do that Christmas tree. Just the way we are.

 

We are so blessed by a God that loves us so much and has given us so much and this Christmas season I do not take that for granted. I am so thankful for my Heavenly Father who sent His son to save us all. I am so thankful that He loves us.

 

Merry Christmas! I hope you all have wonderful season filled with love and fellowship with your relationship with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

Sunday

I woke up this morning feeling empty. I reminded myself that I need to take time out to "commune" or fellowship with God. With our upcoming move and all the details and preparations there are to do I have been so busy concentrating on daily tasks that I have put aside my daily time with the Lord. So before I arose from bed this morning, I said a little prayer asking God to enter my mind, spirit, and heart before the day truly starts.

It used to be that Sunday was just another day off and I did what I wanted with no thought at all to the Lord - the enemy always made it enticing to do so too, yet I never realized this until now. When I was a child I looked forward to it to spend time together with my family doing "Sunday" things. Even though we went to church there wasn't much impression on me about anything I heard or learned there. What I loved was being together afterward eating a Sunday dinner, taking a drive, or playing board games and watching television. But now things are different. You know what I love about Sundays now? All the troubles are forgotten and I find I spend my day focusing on God more than any other day of the week!

Today is Communion Sunday - I am focusing on Jesus Christ dying on the cross for us so that our sins could be forgiven and that we may have life. I never understood this before but as I continue my walk with God my testimony of His Gospel is increasing in me and I am finding that I am getting richer and richer in not only coming to know who Jesus is, but coming to love Him.

Yes, I am getting to the point in my relationship with God that I have not been in before! Before my newfound walk and love with God I wasn't really sure about who Jesus was and why He was so important. I knew of Him, I knew He had a big part in why I even knew God in the first place, but yet I didn't have a personal relationship with Him. Until now. I recently read the book of John for the first time in my life and I had no idea I would get to know Jesus on such a very personal level.

I want to thank the Lord for His gracious abundance of blessings and love for not only me but for all of us! I want to thank Him for sending His only son to us and giving us this precious gift of life! I praise the Lord God for beckoning to me so long ago and being patient waiting for me to respond and now that I have he has given me ears to hear His voice and eyes to see His work so that I may know it in order that I will recognize Him and continually seek Him. I am so grateful to be a child of God!

What do you do?

So what do you do when you leave church speechless...in utter emotional drama and tears yet feeling so full and joyful at the same time? So much with the spirit inside you but at the same time you don't even remember what the sermon was about?

That was my experience today. After the day passed, I do infact remember the sermon, however what I remember the most was how the spirit overcame our little congregation in our little sanctuary and we were filled. I felt His love for me then and there and yet I wept because of it. Others were weeping too. My heart was fuller at that moment than it has been in a long time.

Later today I recalled that during the sermon I was pondering upon my level of integrity. Where will I be when He comes again? In what state will my heart be? Will I be worried too much of the things of this world whilst caught in a dry state of spirituality as I have been the past 6 months? And if I am in a dry spell will I think to pray for Him to enter my heart and fill it with His light and life to quench my drying spirit?

I once was lost but now know where I am going when life here on earth is over and I am so thankful for this gift and to be loved by my maker. However I know that I can easily be caught up in things and inattentive to subtle changes in life...this I know all too well lately I hate to admit. But there is one thing that I always remind myself of and that one thing always prompts me to get into the word. That one things is love. He loves me. He loves us.

I don't understand it and yet I am not made to. How and why does he love me? I don't get it but it is beautiful. Have you ever wondered the mysterious way of how you have the capacity to believe in something you don't even understand? Yet when filled with the spirit is so easy to understand it completely. It is awesome! God's grace is what it is and what a blessing when it comes! I can't even explain it but if you have this personal relationship with your Savior you know what I am talking about.

I pray that I will obey the promptings of the Lord instead of putting off or discrediting the time I will spend reading in my Word. Due to the subtle changes in life I have allowed my sin to progress to becoming slothful and not feeding the spirit from Your word. I pray that I will make a daily effort to spend time with You. I admit that I have not kept my Savior in the forefront of my mind during this dry spell but know that if I persevere I will be in a green pasture! I just pray, for you know what is in my heart and where I am and I pray that I will receive you when you call me.

Thanksgiving

I am thankful for all the wonderful gifts I have been given. That I am a child of God. That I have the Word to read when I am doubtful, the Spirit to guide me, and the gift of being forgiven of my sins. I pray that I will begin again to start following the promptings I receive and act on them instead of leave them to the wayside and drought in this valley.

I am excited and looking forward to the season of Christmas and am hopeful that the joy will arise in my home and family and be sustained for the new year to come.

Why I am a Christian

I have been contemplating something for all my life. The truth.

The verse below describes what I feel.

Job 32:18 NLT
"For I am full of pent-up words,and the spirit within me urges me on."

The question that I am led to find an answer for:

1 Peter 3:15 NLT
"Instead, you must worship Christ as Lord of your life. And if someone asks about your Christian hope, always be ready to explain it."

Why do I believe what I do? Sure I've always felt good about things or known what the results would be if given a generic answer, but I was never really able to truly answer why I believed what I believe. I needed to know and unfortunately until I finally asked myself this question, I found I didn't really believe in anything to my surprise.

This verse has really been etched in my mind. When asked, what will I say?

I have noticed others when asked as to why they believe what they believe I hear them replying with "We" statements rather than "I" statements. "We believe" this or "We practice" that. It almost sounds as if they have rehearsed the faith statements given by their religion or church and have used it for their answer of why they have hope. But where is the answer explaining the root of their belief on a personal level? Most importantly, where is mine?

After some thought I hope to find that maybe they weren't prepared for this answer either. That their thoughts and beliefs are not just stemmed from the church they are attending and that they truly do have an intimate relationship with Christ. This happens all the time though. People get in the "We" mode and don't think for ourselves, myself included. Had I been asked a year or more ago why I believe what I do, I hate to say that I wouldn't have been able to tell you.

While I don't have a lot of knowledge of religion, I do have the experience of having been in one and know now that I never felt it was "right" or "true" to practice there in. Not for me it wasn't. That plain. That simple.

You see, I was raised in the LDS church and from my memory we did some of the practices such as family home evening or girls camp - really good quality time spent together and as a child I soaked it all in. But I never recalled reading scripture or having discussions personally as a family. I don't ever remember being taught that personal relationship with Jesus was something I could have.

Maybe this is the root of my unbelief then? That I was uneducated? Educated or not, the naivety along with no desire or inquisition of the religion I grew up in, I was not subject to grow in it. I don't think I was supposed to either. I believe God has a plan for all of us to come to know Him in a unique way and in His timing.

Since then I've never had the desire to seek any religion. Just God. And now that I have truly found God, I have also found Christ. I have found Him like I've never found Him before.

Why do I believe what I do? Why am I a Christian? Because I wouldn't dare put anyone else's name in place of Christ and for good reasons:

1. Christ is complete. Whole. There is no need for anyone else. His son to whom He gave to us on purpose for purpose. Praise Him and the Word He delivers to us through the messages. Doing this completes me. I have no need for anything else. If I did, why then would Christ's second coming be so important? No wonder why I never understood - I was reading the wrong book and was taught religion, not relationship!

2. I have a personal relationship with God, Christ, and the Holy Spirit - the trinity. These are the three living beings that constantly reveal to me God's plan of love, compassion, mercy, grace, conviction, forgiveness, etc. that I cannot deny! I find God's Word every time I open the Bible or simply in prayer or conversation with Him. Add to this the messages received and praise given to glorify Him completely charges my spiritual battery! I am spoken to in so many ways and am so appreciative of it. Grace and miracles are so abundant before my very eyes.

3. I love Jesus and am amazed by His sacrifice for me. I know His plan of salvation for me and I know that my only work here on earth is to influence others for His sake and for the Glory of God. None of the work I do for Him earns me a spot in heaven, He paid for it all on the cross.

4. The Bible is living and active. There is no supplement. The Bible is the ONLY Word from God. The Spirit tells me this. The Bible didn't always speak as a living Word to me, but since I have persevered, sought, and received Christ as my savior revealing the gift of my salvation to me, the Spirit has been strong within and the Bible living and active. The enemy enjoys distracting us away from the truth and unfortunately time was spent during a large part of my life focusing on the wrong book.

5. I am witness. I have had many revelations, prayers answered instantly and not so instantly but all answered the same. God is consistent. There is meaning and actual purpose for my fasting that I never even realized. I have learned this, and that it is not just a ritual everyone does on the first Sunday of the month.

6. Relationship. I have a relationship with the Lord who walks with me daily. To know that Jesus died for me, is utterly heartbreaking but I know He did it for Love. I now converse with Him during this time with Him and thank Him like I never have before.

7. I need Christ. God loved me so much that he sent His only begotten son for me. I need a Savior. I am a sinner. Until I realized this, I could never really accept Jesus as my Savior. Interesting how the enemy kept me feeling comfortable in sin.

8. God tells me so. Believe me, I have asked of Him, "If I am to be in a setting for you Lord, show me where? If the way of religion is true show me and I will obey." He showed me Christ and revealed his Word in the Bible and the plan of salvation and I now know the truth. I am so gratefule that I finally came to know Christ and His Gospel.

I am a Christian because I believe in Christ and His Gospel. I am proud to have "Christ's" name first and foremost in my thoughts. Religion doesn't work for me. Relationship with Christ does. And like I said earlier, I wouldn't put anyone else's name in place of Christ's. Therefore I am Christian!